Let's say Goodbye to Mum Guilt

The more I see people talking about mum guilt, the more I feel it is being normalised which is crazy and unnecessary in my opinion so I was in two minds about writing this as here I am also talking about it, but I want to show you why you do NOT need to feel it. Lots of people talk about "mum guilt" as if it's a given, and then if you're anything like me you have a moment where you think 'hang on, I feel a bit guilty for NOT feeling mum guilt' and it starts to get stupid. 

I have never been a Mum that feels guilty for leaving my kids to go and do something for myself (apart from if they're ill, but here's where the points below become even more important.) This may sound incredibly selfish to some, but I'm going to explain my reasons in the hope that they might help if you find yourself feeling like you shouldn't take time for yourself. 

• They are with someone who I trust to look after them.
  Like you, I would always spend time organising who they are going to be with when I am off doing something else whether that is for an hour or the day or the weekend. They are not left with a stranger who they don't know, and I am 100% sure that they are going to be having a lovely time together, and often it's with a friend or family member who loves and cares for them so there is no need to be feeling guilty. 
   
• I need this FOR them
  I know, and you know, that to be a good and patient Mum you need to pour into your own cup too. The longer it goes that I don't have any time for me, I find myself getting less patient, less fun and not the parent I want to be. I always come back to them ready and raring to go with a refreshed mindset and I know they notice it.
   
• You matter too
  Spending every day making sure everyone else has everything they need, and aren't late and have eaten enough etc can take it's toll when you forget that you need things too. How often have you got to the end of the day and realised that even though your children have had their beautiful water bottles topped up regularly, you haven't drunk a drop? Or they have been to football club and tennis lessons and you've sat in the car being a taxi driver all day? You are just as important as they are and if you don't satisfy some of your needs too, you won't be able to support them. 
  
  
• Everyone needs different things
  Some Mums will fill up their cup by seeing friends and being social, whereas some need time on their own. Some Mums love to go on a run or lift weights and others like to do yoga or even go and get their nails done but it doesn't really matter. Whatever it is that you need to do, doesn't need justifying. However you spend your time is of no interest to anyone else. 

The only time I feel guilty for leaving my children is when they are poorly, but even then I would never leave them if they weren't totally safe and cared for by someone I trusted entirely. Don't let social media, or other parents lead you to believe you SHOULD be feeling guilty if you do something for yourself without your kids.

Remember what I always tell you ... you are not JUST a Mum, the other parts of you matter too!